Why Does Love Hurt?


Article © Arun Maji///

Painting: William Adolphe Bouguereau///

We often fall for love then something happens and we fall apart. Then we whine- love hurts. How true is that? Let’s examine- what is love!  Let’s examine what we fell for in first place!

Love is what we all are. Love is our soul. We are product of love; the whole creation is product of love. Without love there is no existence. Love is ingrained in us. Love is the soul and love is the extension of our soul. Then you may ask me- if love is ingrained in us then why are we not more loving and caring? Yes it’s a valid question.

To have something is one thing, and to utilise that thing is another thing! You may have billion dollars sitting in your bank account but you can be too miser to go for a holiday. You may have talent for painting but you are too lazy to do the hard work of practice to make you Vinci!

For love too, we can be- too miser, too selfish, too lazy and too blind. Though love is ingrained in us yet we don’t use it. We don’t use love because our selfishness makes us blind to see the elegance and opulence of love. Then, we are conditioned to those fear and rumour. We often say- “love hurts”! Tell me- what doesn’t hurt! Life hurts, chest hurts, leg hurts and even your wealth hurts you! If you posses something, it’s bound to hurt you. To have is to be hurt.

Next, let me examine- why love hurts! A true love is something which is you. A true love is extension of your soul. And your soul has the capacity to be expanded to this universe. That’s why in some traditional philosophy, it’s said that- we are part of the soul of the creator. And the soul of the creator is extended to this universe. It means- it is your very nature to love,  just for sake of love. Love’s purpose is love; love’s purpose is more love. If your love has any other purpose than love, then it’s not love. Now I know, I am hurting you with bitter truth. Please forgive me. So you challenge me now, you ask me- “hey man, are you the man of this world or a dream world”? Well, if dream is the only way to bring happiness to this world, then why don’t we go for that dream? Let me guarantee you this- if you are too blind to see the beauty, elegance and opulence of love then be sure- you will cause yourself immense pain and suffering. You will hurt yourself but you won’t have any healing power. Because it’s only the love and love’s derivatives like- kindness, care, compassion which have healing capacity.

So what is it, you fall for? Is that a love? Ask yourself honestly. If it is, then be sure- it won’t hurt you! Even if it hurts you, you would definitely heal yourself soon. But if you fall for external charm, beauty, wealth, pleasure etc. then be sure to know, that those things will be lost sooner or later. And then your so called love will vanish. And that parting will not be a smooth one. There will be tears, there will be blood! Because you expect something and you may not get it. Purpose of your love was something else than love. This will hurt you- you will be angry, you will be disappointed, you will be depressed and you will be mad.

To sum it up- love is there with you and the universe, as they are born into existence. We just need to break the wall of our selfishness so that our soul (which is love itself) can grow into this universe. We really need to know what true love is. We can’t have materialistic purpose like gain, pleasure, wealth as purpose of love. Then be sure, love will hurt you; it will hurt you a lot. The only certain way, you can be truly happy is to love more. We can learn to love every moment by being more caring, kind and compassionate to other thing and being of this universe. Love is absolute. It doesn’t happen that you  love your son but hate your neighbour, yet you call it love! Either you love everybody or you don’t. What you show as a love to your son, is just another relationship of comfort and materialistic purpose. And that sort of love in future turns to vicious relationship when that son is parted from father, some way or the other.

Please note- not to love is not to have a soul. And not to have a soul is not to have an existence- it’s like we are walking dead-corpse!

I love you all.


Let Me Tell You My Way

Let Me Tell You My Way/

Poem © Arun Maji


Painting: Rob Hefferan


Being alone is a bliss to me!

Not because I like the serenity

Rather it’s the wilderness of wild mind

That thrills me, intrigues me.

If I’m with you alone, I’m doing it.

If I’m with me alone, I’m rehearsing it.

“Dirtiness” is a dirty word to me!

I like those kinky, nasty thought of yours!

I like they way-your greedy tongue

Plays on my intensely thirsty lips!

I like they way- you bite me, eat me

Make me bleed, yet ask you to go on!

I like the way- you run your nails

Teasing me, hurting me, wounding me!

I like the way- you tremble, shiver, convulse

Bouts after bouts, not caring to stop!

I like the way- you groan, moan, cry

Speak filthy words and gasp breathing!

I like they way- you calm down at last

After screaming as loud as a thunder!

Say “No” To Violence and Killing

Yet another terror attack, this time in Gurudaspur, Punjab/India! I wonder when we would stop killing each other!

I would never agree with anyone who says this attack on humanity can’t be stopped! I won’t agree with anyone who says- the statesmen and the leaders don’t understand; why terror attack happens! If those leaders say- they really don’t know how to contain terror attack, I would love to question their ability and good will to be the leaders of people!

I would never ever shift from my belief that every human being is good. When some people kill with such a passion, motivation and plan, we need to understand those people deeply. We need to understand -If they kill why they kill! I would never believe either, that those people who kill, they don’t understand the evil nature of killing. They know the evil nature of killing but still they kill.

If those killers know the evil nature of killing- they why do they kill? Simple answer is- their pain and agony are more than their appeal of conscience.

We really need to shift the way we manage violence and killing. We need to stop demonizing people. We need to sit back and think- how an innocent human being become a killer! War on terrorism is just another kind of terrorism. No killing can be stopped by another killing. You may suppress the problem but with time, the problem will get worse. That’s why the situation in Afghanistan, Iraq etc will never be solved with present kind of attitude.

If we dig into this question (why a killer kills) we will find- there will be evil forces who torture people, mis-treats people years after years, generations after generations. There will be evil forces who create hatred and division amongst the people for their own vested interest. As the then British did; they harvested the seed of hatred amongst people of the then “Bharatbarsha/India”. They divided people, they divided country just to make sure- blood shed continues in that sub-continent for ever.

Sadly, people of both Pakistan and India are still carrying this hatred. Now, they are falling prey to the evil agenda of their political leaders, religious leaders and social leaders. They sometime instigate hatred, violence and killing to hide their evil faces. None can save us from this evil forces unless we the common people do something about it.

What we can do about it? We need to teach each other- any hatred and violence is artificial and destructive to common people. Those hatreds are the creation of evil mind to dominate over common people. An evil leader will lose his/her relevance if we stop hating each other and killing each other. That’s why they keep instigating hatred, violence and killing. They run organised propaganda under disguise of religion, patriotism etc. Let me tell you- human being is far greater than any religion or nation. No act of killing can be justified on ground of religion or patriotism.

We all have to remember that we all are human being. We all are born to the same world. Boundary of race, colour, religion and nation etc- they all are artificial.

Please, my dear brother and sisters across the world, stop demonizing each other, stop hating each other and stop dividing our brotherly relationship. Please just don’t sit back and see this cruel fun of violence and killing continue for ever. Please be active, please run non-violent campaign against those evil forces who create hatred and division amongst the people.

Please help yourself, help your neighbours, and help your brothers across the world with peace. Please be at peace and let the peace in the world follow you. Please remember- we are born free, and we should die free- free from all illusion of division in this creation. We all are one.

I love you all.

Say “No” To Violence and Killing

Article by Arun Maji

Painting by Rassouli

Tagore and Today’s India

Copyright: Arun Maji////


Many people often express disappointment that we are forgetting Tagore very fast. They maintain- today’s generation is not that interested in Tagore any more. There is some truth in this disappointment.

I would like to ask – Is Tagore relevant in today’s context? To answer this question I like to discuss what this Tagore is all about.

When I was a little kid, my mathematics teacher (who was an ardent admirer of Tagore) used to say- “in centuries to come, people would think Tagore was not a single person, for his writings are so huge and diverse”. I think that remark of my village teacher explains it all.

Tagore was a true poet and a writer. He asked questions, he asked questions again and again. He might not have all answers but he kept asking questions in his writings. And that is the quality of a great philosopher. A true philosopher keeps asking questions on everything of our being. Only through questions the answers to our problems come.

When we read Tagore carefully, we start asking ourselves a lot of questions. We ask ourselves- what this life is all about, what this death is all about, what this pain is all about, what this vast sky is all about, what this violence and war is all about. Very few people on this earth has been able to enable people; ask so many questions. And that is why, Tagore is so superbly great.

His poetic expression and musical elegance in his writings come next to his philosophical contents. His every bit of words are very soothing and musical as if some one is playing a flute to our ears.

If one read Tagore’s writings carefully, he may not be able to finish reading Tagore’s writings in one life time. Such is the volume of his writings.

It’s unfortunate that Tagore’s work doesn’t have many good quality translations to make them reach to people around this planet. I think all Bengali People around this world should take up this challenge and try do something to make Tagore’s work known to all in the world.

Tagore truly imbibed the Indian philosophy and he reflected that philosophy in every word of his writings. Indian philosophy is a gem in the jewels of this planet. Not many people around the world are aware of this gem because as Indians we have failed to make it reach to people around the world. Tagore tried this through his writings but he wrote in Bengali limiting himself to only Bengali readers (except few, like in Geetanjali). That is why as a Bengali people we have responsibility to make his writings available to the world.

It will not hurt Tagore, if we forget him because he is dead anyway. But it will certainly hurt us if we forget him. Because when the materialism is eroding very essence of India, we have nothing left to revert back to.

The peace and happiness does not come to this world unless as individual we have peace and happiness. Like all other very great piece of arts, Tagore’s writings are the mirror on which we all can see our souls. Life’s whole journey is meant to be development of this ability to see one’s soul. Tagore’s writings do exactly what we need. If we want to pursue peace and happiness we need a mirror to see our souls. Tgaore’s writings are the mirror. And that is why I say- if we forget Tagore, it’s us who will suffer.

Our mythological texts are also getting lost for we have not adapted them to the need of our age. We have arrogance to be proud but we have no true intention to preserve, maintain and expand those texts to the need of our people. In relation to Tagore, I have similar feelings that he will be lost soon unless we adapt his writings to the need of our age.

How can we do that? We need some experts (in Tagore) who will keep teaching Tagore in schools, colleges and universities. We need very good quality translators who can translate Tagore’s writings to other world languages. When I say expert in Tgaore, I don’t mean those experts who merely remember Tagore’s writings. I mean those people who understand the essence of Indian philosophy, thereby understands the philosophy of Tgaore.

This effort needs to be made at all levels- both individual and organisational. The states and the institutes need to train the trainers who in turn can impart this knowledge to the mass.

I truly believe that if you have pain and sufferings that you can’t handle yourselves, then please read Tagore. He has the direction to guide you in otherwise difficult journey of life.

I wish you all a very great journey to your peace and happiness through Tagore’s writings.

Please Help Rebuild Nepal

When everything disappears

My begging bowl appears.

Those quakes of the quake

Will die down.

Those melancholy of the beating hearts

Will die down.

Those speeches of the speakers

Will die down.

Those cry of the beautiful media-faces

Will die down.


My bloody hungry stomach

Will keep crying loud.

Who cares?

Who cares those memories

Of quakes, kinks and cry?

When burning stomach

Is the only reality of this calamity

Who cares those

Quakes, kinks and cry?

I’m shining my begging bowl

And rehearsing my catchy pray-

“Baba, a single coin

A single coin, please.”


Poem: Aftermath of Quakes

Arun Maji

Copyright: Arun Maji

Please Help Those Kids In Nepal

Ek Roti De Do Babu

Ek Roti De Do.

“Bacche, Teri Maa Kanha Hai?”

Mujhe Bhukh Lagti Hai.

“Bacche, Teri Naam Kya Hai”

Mujhe Bhukh Lagti Hai.

“Bachhe, Teri Shir Se Khun Girti Hai”

Mujhe Bhukh Lagti Hai.

Pata Nahi Mujhe-

Ye Dard kya Hai

Ye Khun kya Hai

Ye Bhukomp Kya Hai.


Mujhe Bhukh Lagti Hai.

Ek Roti De Do Babu

Ek Roti De Do.

Bhagwan Apko Mangal Kore –

Ek Roti De Do Babu

Ek Roti De Do.

Kya Faida

Ye Bhukopmp Ko Yad Kore.


Ye Yad Ko Bhi, Yad Nahi Hogi.

Lekin Meri Pet Ki Dard

E Shale Thik Jite Rahagi.

Ek Roti De Do Babu

Ek Roti De Do.


Poem: Pet Ki Dard

Arun Maji

Copyright: Arun Maji


The Power of Love

If you are in pain, read this short article.

If you are in distress, read this short article.

If you are in joy, read this short article.

For I can guarantee you, you won’t repent reading it.


The Power of Love

Arun Maji

Copyright: Arun Maji

(I don’t know painter’s name- if any body knows, please let me know)////


Often people ask me a valid question- how hard is it to achieve the peace in this world? I ask them back – how hard is it for you to free yourself from hatred? Achieving world peace is as easy as freeing yourself from hatred; or achieving world peace is as hard as freeing yourself from hatred.

How hard is it to free yourself from hatred? It’s a hard work. You can do it only when you put your constant effort.

How do you free yourself from hatred? You don’t fight hatred- that’s not the way you free yourself from hatred. Please remember- any fight is an aggression and every aggression comes from hatred.

You just keep loving. You keep loving endlessly and unconditionally. You keep loving yourself, this nature and every being of this world.

How do you know that you are loving? When you feel that you are feeling fullness in emptiness, then you know you are loving. You feel content, you feel satisfied, you feel strong, you feel kind, you feel compassionate, you forgive yourself and others, and even you will cry for apparent no reason. Then you know you are there.

You may ask me- why would I free myself from hatred? Hatred serves my purpose; and hatred can make me rich and famous! Well, I really don’t know if hatred serves your purpose or it can make you rich and famous!

But I assure you beyond doubt – that if you don’t have compass in your life, you will be lost in your journey. You will be chained, pained and tortured. You will cry misery. You will be living dead. Then- what compass am I talking of?

Life’s compass is a single question. And that question is- “what is the purpose of my life?” If you get that answer right in your living (I mean in your day to day living), I can assure you- you get the eternal peace. You get peace within you. And automatically this world will be at peace. More people get into this stage, more peace this world will have.

So what is the purpose of life? I have pondered this question for few decades. I might have heard the answer many times but it did not penetrate my soul earlier. It took me painful experiences in my life to convince me with the answer. Today I can tell you the answer beyond doubt- that the purpose of a life is – to bring peace, serenity, calmness and sense of well-being within oneself.

So everyday, before you do anything- you ask yourself “will this particular act will bring me peace, serenity, calmness and sense of well-being?” if the answer is yes, you do it. Otherwise you don’t do it. If you can carry this compass question in your life, I can guarantee you that you will never be at misery.

However, I don’t suggest that you won’t be chained, pained or tortured. You would certainly be (because pain is inter-twined with your life, you can’t separate pain from your life, pain is inevitable). But you will heal yourself very fast. You will suffer much less. I challenge you all- prove me wrong in my writing.

Why have I brought this question of compass in this discussion? Because if you know- that your purpose of life is to bring peace, serenity, calmness and sense of well-being within yourself; then you know that you have to free yourself from “hatred”. You don’t have any other choice. Because hatred makes you angry, jealous and sick. If you carry hatred, you suffer pain for ever.

And I have said earlier- the one and the only way to free yourself from hatred is to nurture love within you. You have to consciously nurture it. You have to practice it again and again, like any other skills you want to learn.

How do you practice love? You just love. You love unconditionally and endlessly. You love yourself, you love every being of this universe- your friends, foes, children, animals, stars, moon, sea, I mean every being of this universe. You show kindness, compassion and forgiveness every moment. You will fail but you will win. You will fail again but you will win again. More you practice, more you learn.

You think love, dream love and act love. You listen to music, you listen to unspoken words of sea, you listen to whisper of wind, you listen to conversation of birds. You listen to your soul, you listen to other’s soul. You listen more to unspoken words than spoken words. You listen more to incomprehensible sound than comprehensible sound.

When you listen- you absorb energy of this universe and you become stronger. If you talk more- you expend your energy more and you feel tired. Listening to this universe is the path to your soul. The creator is clever- he has given you just one mouth and two ears for the right reason.

Then you feel. You feel more and express less. Feeling is also the path to your soul. Why do I ask you to listen more to incomprehensible sound than comprehensible sound? Because when you listen to incomprehensible sound then you awaken your feelings more. You try to understand that incomprehensible sound with all your feelings. When you feel, you absorb energy of this universe and you become stronger.

I hope, you don’t just read this article. I ask you to listen to this article. I ask you to feel this article. You know- none of us is perfect, none of us is clever enough, none of us is learned enough. But we all can encourage each other to love everybody at every moment. Love is the only answer to our sufferings.

I pray (to whoever He or She is)- that you are blessed with infinite love. I don’t have anything to offer you but my very heart felt love. I love you all.



I am campaigning for love and peace. Please share this and support my humble effort. Your strength is the strength of this humanity.